4/27/2010

My mother's funeral!

We lost another friend this week and I was totally amazed at all his accomplishments that were listed in his obituary.. We'd only known him through bridge the last 8+ years and had no idea of his life before that... I'm hoping his funeral will be a celebration of his life as he made a real difference in this world.

My mother is 90 and very strong-minded and in control....no sign of dementia there... She has strong feelings about her own demise and last fall she took my sister and made all the arrangements.. I haven't a clue to what was settled as I was not only not invited.. I was banned... I'm sure the funeral director will whisk her away in the dead of night and she'll be buried before morning without any ceremony whatever. I am forbidden to have anything to do with it as she's sure I'd turn it into a celebration of her life...

She's right of course...I would. She started so poor with so little education and achieved so much by hard work and determination... So I'll probably have a party instead of a funeral and invite all her friends and celebrate her life anyway. Please don't tell her or she'd be absolutely furious with me....

In this photo they were on their way to follow the fruit harvest in the orchards in central Washington. My mother is the girl in the back with the white hat... Notice the wheels...the wooden spokes had to be wrapped with wet rags to keep them from drying out...

5 comments:

Diane said...

Sorry to hear of your loss. He sounds like he made a real impression on you. Funerals are a way to say good bye and put closer on the passing of a love one. But I agree with you celebrations of life are so powerful and allow us to embrace the person and their contributions. God bless you and yours,
Diane

kerrykatiecakeskeb43 said...

I love the photo of your mom Gerry - I can see where you get your wicked smile!
Hugs,
Kerry

Carol said...

When I was young (I'm 58) I used to get upset watching people at the family gatherings after funerals. How could they be laughing and having a good time. Now that I am older, I realize what the celebration of one's life is.

Plays with Needles said...

So sorry to hear about your friend Gerry. My mother would always describe losing friends as if she were in a theater that started out very crowded and, as life goes on, slowly the seats empty...she never talked about the seats being filled by someone new which I thought was interesting..she was much more of a private woman and it would never occur to her to fill the seat that belonged to someone she loved.

As for YOUR Mom, I can see where you get much of your strength and determination. Wouldn't it be a hoot if she planned something absolutely crazy for her burial? But you're probably right...I wonder what I would plan??? hmmmm.....

Lauri said...

NuMom
That's how funerals should be. When my real Mom died, she had demanded that we all wear red ( her favorite color) because she was going somewhere better. My husband wants hawaiian shirts and a true Irish wake. Then his ashes to be dropped at an undisclosed Disney park Then the rest of his ashes set on fire ina replica Viking ship
You should be remembering their wonderful lives, not indulging in yoor own grief

Off my soapbox
Lauri

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